These past few days NASA scientists have been in a very understandable and excitable flap over their discovery of liquid water on Mars. So how is that possible given the planet’s freezing temperatures? Ah ha! Well it seems vast amounts of salt are keeping the water in liquid form, but you wouldn’t want to drink it of course. Bleh! So how did water get on Mars and then where did it all go? Well it’s theorized that Mars was once like the Earth with a lovely atmosphere and lots of life giving aqua, but over time Mars lost pretty much all of its water through devastating climatic changes. So in other words – no environment, no water.
So what does that mean for life on Mars? Well at this stage I see three distinct possibilities. One, humans go to Mars, ingest the water and get overcome by some kind of weird Martian bacteria as Doctor Who showed us. Two, the planet is inhabited by a mysterious race of Salt Vampires, first discovered by the Star Trekking crew of the Enterprise. These creatures need vast amounts of salt to survive making Martian water the perfect food source for these hairy lairy folks. Or three, perhaps the Martian people fled to a wonderfully nearby blue-green marble of a planet when their own world started to become uninhabitable, and their descendants live among us Earthlings today….